Hodgepodge

     This past week, we learned about relationships. We combined class with the GMC, so each day, we had to drive the 1/2 hour or so there for class. It will definitely be good to be able to stay at home this week instead of having to do so much travelling!
     On Tuesday evening, we went straight from Camp Tuesday to City Church, where we gobbled down some pizza in the parking lot before heading inside for a prayer evening. The people there wanted to pray for our outreach teams, sending us out, and so this was the time that they did that. It was really good. First we worshipped, and then they prayed over us.
     Other than that, it was a pretty normal week. Yesterday morning, Kenzie suggested that we go do something fun, so the two of us went on a date to the pet store :P After, almost everyone asked us why we would go there. But for us, it was never a question- why wouldn't we want to go to the pet store?! We spent 3 hours there. Just look at this cuteness!

     

     So cute :) After the pet store, we grabbed a bite to eat before going to the book store for... well, 2 hours. And then we went to a storage unit for another almost 2 hours! When Kenzie and I do something together, time somehow flies by so fast and we end up there for a long time!
     Anyway, so I think I mentioned how much I enjoy going down to the basement and sitting on the dryer for some alone/God time. Well, everyone else has also discovered the place, and so there is basically always someone there. So I had to find a new place to go: the pantry. I honestly go there almost every day with a guitar and my Bible and I just play and sing and spend time with Jesus. It is so great! I love it! I will be doing that and suddenly it has been an hour to two. Its crazy! I have some really good times with God in the pantry :) And with Rudolph, the mouse. But they are trying to kill him... poor little Rudolph! He was so cute...
     Seriously though, I love spending time just playing and singing for God :)
     In my one on one this week, Keisha and I were talking about obedience to God. I was talking about a few times recently when I have heard God tell me to do something, and I obeyed, and what the results were. And that lead to this discussion- when you obey God, it always results in good. Even if it feels weird, or uncomfortable! Most of the time, I really don't want to do what He is telling me. But I choose to obey, and in the end, even though it may be weird or awkward and uncomfortable for me, it turns out good.
     This is our last weekend in Madison before going home for Christmas break. This is our last week of classes! Lecture phase of DTS is nearly over! Where did the time go?! Didn't we just all arrive here? Yet we are leaving for outreach in less than a month! We have a week of Christmas break, a week back here to prepare for outreach, and then, on January 3rd, all the teams head off for their outreach destinations!
     I'll see most of you soon!! :) Less than a week and I will be home, God willing!
     Blessings,
          Katie

 We always sing this song to Anna, and she always responds with "YES!" Sadly, we still have no snow, other than a few patches here and there. So she still has not built her snowman.

 I like to doodle on my notes during class. My way of doodling is mostly just words, since I can't draw (the snowman one is another of my class doodles). This is a word that God has been bringing up a lot to me during DTS. 

So some of you who I saw at Thanksgiving know this, but of our 3 toilets in the girls bathroom, one never flushes, so really we've only had 2 toilets for 35 girls. And one of those has been known to overflow a couple times... anyway, so this week, we got a new toilet! IT IS MARVELLOUS! We now have three toilets! :P Sorry, but we are all super excited!

WOW

     I know, I know, I just posted like, an hour or two ago. But guys, God is so so so so amazing!!!
     Last night, we had an evening of offering. We listened to worship music and spent time in God's presence, asking Him if He wanted us to give to anyone's outreach fund. If He did, how much and to whom.
     We have a joke around here that we are in YWAM, Youth Without Any Money. And it is true... no one has money here. We are a poor bunch over here! Every single outreach team needs at LEAST 10 thousand dollars still. Most need closer to 20. We have no money to give, okay!
     So we had last night. Tonight, Kevin revealed how much was given. I don't remember the exact number, but I know that it was OVER eleven thousand dollars. Eleven THOUSAND!!! I mean, where did it come from?!?! We have no idea.... we are poor YWAMers with no money who somehow managed to give over eleven thousand dollars to each other.
     God is amazing!
     Blessings
          Katie

He Answers

     Last week, Keisha started our one-on-one by going deep immediately.  We sat down and she said, "So, Katie, tell me why God loves you."
     I stammered out some sort of answer, but long after our time was over, I was thinking about it. I had struggled to answer. And it bothered me that I didn't have an answer for that question.
     That same evening, Kayla needed to go to an atm, so Anna, Annika, Kari, and I accompanied her. After, even though it was 9:30 at night, we went to McDonald's and just hung out, doing homework. I sat by the fireplace (it was a very nice McDonalds!) and asked God that question. "God, why do you love me?"
     Rather than going straight to what God said,  I feel like He wants me to first type up my written prayer to Him.
     "Papa God,
     You are good. You are true. You are life. You are love.
     You love me. For me. Nothing I do -or don't do- can EVER affect that love You have for me, because Your love is unconditional. I may still be coming to a realization of Your love for me, God, but I really am beginning to see the truth. You love me so much more than I ever imagined!
     Thank you for loving me so much, Father, and so unconditionally. I know You do, and its amazing and wonderful! I love You back, Lord, as much as I am able. I don't know how to love very well. But I'm working on it, God, if You'll help me. Because I really, really want to learn how to truly love, both You and people, but especially You.
     I have to know, though, God. Please answer me! Why? Why do You love me? I mean, I get that You are my creator; You love me because You created me. And You're my Father, so You love me cause I'm Your daughter. So You love me cause You have to. But there is more to it, God! I know that You don't just love me because You have to! But why do You love me? I want to know- I need to know!"
     So after I prayed that, I waited on what God would say to me. I knew He would respond, and He did. He started to tell me some of the reasons why He loves me. I know that what He has told me isn't all of it... He loves me for so much more than this.  But these are just a few of the reasons He loves me so much.
     I'm not going to go into detail about what God told me about why He loves me. Honestly, I'm still processing it with Him. But I'll just write a couple of the things down. This is what He said:
     -"You are quiet". This one actually made me laugh and think of the response some of you would have to this statement . But I understand what God means when He said this, so that's what matters! And it's not about being quiet in everyday life!
     -"Your willingness"
     -"Your tender heart"
     -"Your laughter and smiles"
     There was more, but that doesn't really matter. The point is, I had a genuine question for God, and He answered me. He loves me, and He loves all of you equally as much. It's amazing!!
     Blessings,
          Katie

No Words

     Yesterday, Anna asked me if I would be driving to church today. I hadn't really planned to, since I have limited American cash, and I need to make sure that I have enough left to get me home at Christmas break. And since I need to get a shot next week, which is pricey and I hadn't expected, I am trying to be careful with how much I spend.
     However, after some thinking, I decided to drive. Anna and Annika both wanted to go to this one church that they have been to one time before. Jenna described it as "completely crazy". The church is called Global Presence, and they are very spirit led. Anna and Annika both grew up in churches like that, Anna in Brazil and Annika in South Africa. So they really enjoyed it, but others like myself were warned that it might not be ideal for us.
     So today, I got up much earlier than I normally do on Sunday- we left here shortly after 9. I took Anna, Annika, and Kari with me, and we went to the Global Presence church.
     Guys, it was amazing! You don't understand! It was absolutely, totally amazing! The service lasted for 2 1/2 hours, but it didn't feel that long. The pastors -they are a husband and wife team that preach together, which is super nice cause then they can built off of each other- said straight up that up until this morning, they didn't know what their message was going to be. Guys, they planned their message THIS MORNING.
     It was the most amazing thing, because the message was exactly what we learned about this week and this week was a pretty big one for Anna, myself, and Annika and Kari. I took so, so many notes! Annika, being Annika -if you knew her, you'd understand- kept making suppressed squeal noises and shivering excitedly as she frantically wrote stuff down.
     Here are a couple of the things I wrote down that really stand out to me:
     "Embrace the process" This one is key for us YWAMers, because "process" is a hated word around here. After every class, pretty much, we are all like "Oh my goodness, I have to process this!" Or someone will ask you something and you'll say "I'm still trying to process that!" We hate processing. So when the pastor said "Embrace the process," we all just started to laugh. Quite literally, we started laughing there on our couch in the back.
     "God is going to remove idols... if you are not experiencing shaking, you are going to!"
     "Get caught up in the story cause He is still writing it!"
     "We have damage that happens because we didn't wait for the timing of the Lord."
     "Relationship is day and night and night and day and everything in between"
     "We are enslaved to the world... we need to step out of slavery to the world's systems. We need to step out of our worldly comforts, because they enslave you."
     "God is incredibly patient!"
     "God calls us into greatness. We are already equipped- it is already in our hands. Don't use excuses... God will equip you."
     "It isn't about who you are, it is about who God is, who the one with you is! And He is GOD!"
     "The God of the Old Testament is the same God of today. He can do the same things."
     We had a wonderful time at church today. After the service, we went up for prayer and left church feeling so excited, joyful, and full of Jesus. We were just laughing and shouting Jesus's name! It was so amazing!
     Today was a really good day. While our laundry was in the drier, we went to a coffee shop called Beans an' Cream, and we were just sitting there talking. Annika looked at me and just laughed, "Katie, just say it!" She said.
     "Say what?" I asked.
     "I don't know. You have something! That look!"
     "I'm just thinking about God!" I laughed, "He's just.... He's so awesome! I can't put it into words!"
     And it is true. I can't put it into words. We are the children of an incredible, awesome, amazing, wonderful, inexplicable, unfathomable God! He is just amazing!
     I have no words. Even though I wrote this much, I just have no words to describe how awesome God is!
     Blessings,
          Katie

Then Sings My Soul

     Thanksgiving break was fun. Going home and surprising my parents was like, the funnest thing ever! :D And having my car here is really, really awesome. Plus gas is like, super cheap here. I filled up my very empty car for $29 today! My drive back here, for anyone who is interested, was very long and boring. I had to wait at the border for about an hour, I'd say, and the lady asked me like, so many questions -I was talking to her for probably around 10 minutes. And she had me open my trunk and she looked through it. But I got through and kept driving. And driving. And driving. And I got stuck in standstill traffic for awhile. Then I drove some more. And more. And more. Filled up my car. Drove. Drove. Got stuck in more awful traffic. Drove. Drove.... I think you get the picture! I got back home at about 11pm our time, so midnight for you. I was driving for about 12 hours.
     Having my car here has already been a huge blessing, though, even though it was dead for the first half of the week (silly me). Today, Anna and I went to Cool Beans and talked for a couple hours, mostly about God and He has really been speaking to us about recently, before having some intercession about our Camp Tuesday kids, Maeli and Tevin. We have to come up with 2 words that describe them, and a Bible verse for each word. It was really cool how God gave each of us a word for each child, and a different word to both of us. And tomorrow, I am driving to a church called Global Presence, which I have wanted to try out but no one really generally goes there. Anna and Annika have been and really wanted to go again, so again, my having a car is really great!
     Anyway, this past week, the topic was one that was really big for me. It was like, summing up everything I have been working through with God for the past couple months! The topic was the Fear of the Lord. Our speaker was Dawn Bochers, who has actually been around since the beginning of DTS, since she is basically our school leader's boss.
     The first thing Dawn really said was that the fear of the Lord really is just a growing intimacy with God. It is not being afraid of Him. I already knew, coming into the school, what fear of the Lord was- I remember thinking about it and figuring out what it was back in high school. And Dawn really confirmed what I believed it to be- just an awe and revering of Him (to revere being to regard with affectionate awe). Back in high school, it was the hymn How Great Thou Art that really helped me to see and understand what the fear of the Lord was.
     Something God has been speaking to me about for a couple weeks now is intimacy with Him. I am not very good at being vulnerable with people, and intimacy is something that is hard for me- to be honest, it scares me and I don't know why. So I've been working on having an intimate relationship with God. So this week was really, really key for me. Keisha, during my one-on-one on Thursday, told me that she had felt like this was a really important week for me, and she had been praying for me a lot. :) Its awesome how God realized how important it was and knew that I would need the constant prayer.
     I don't really know how to summarize this week, so I shall just write a few quotes from my notes:
     "God doesn't play favourites. You can be as close to God as you want to be. God doesn't set boundaries on how close to Him you can be."
     We had a list of things that we look for in a friend (trustworthy, engaged, loyal, etc) "God is all these things. What are we going to do with it? And does God find these things in me?"
     "God's holiness doesn't make Him unapproachable. It makes Him safe (to be with). You can trust Him. He'll always do what is right."
     "Don't be afraid of God, but take Him seriously."
     "How you live shows what you value. How do you spend your time, money, and what you talk about show what's important to you."
     "God is not rejecting you for what you've done in your life. He is saying 'come to me, bring it to me so we can deal with it together.'"
     "When God speaks, it is not His opinion- it is the truth. So we need to agree with God."
     "You MUST also forgive yourself. If God has forgiven you, you do NOT have the right to say 'no, I'm not'."
     "Are you going to judge God based on your experiences, or your experiences based on what God says and who He is?"
     One last thing I wanted to just quickly mention was when Dawn was talking about how you can grow in your fear of the Lord. She said we need to be honest about where we are- don't pretend to be somewhere you are not. It doesn't do you any good. She compared to to going to meet someone at Starbucks in the Mall of America. You don't know where it is in the mall. You park, and then go find a map. There are two things on the map that are important- where the Starbucks is, and where you are. If you find that you have parked on the opposite side of the mall from Starbucks, it doesn't do you any good to pretend that you parked there. If you try to get to Starbucks by pretending you are somewhere else, it won't work. You need to start where you are, whether you like that place or not, and go from there. It is the same in your spiritual journey. If you wish you were farther than you are, it doesn't do you any good to pretend that you are thus there. You have to start where you are. God doesn't condemn you for where you are- He will work with you! So just begin by asking God to show you where you are, and by being honest about it.
     Well, it is getting late and I really should go to bed- I have to leave for church tomorrow a lot earlier than I usually do! But I'm pretty impressed I got this post done- I did not expect to!
     Blessings,
          Katie

 I like to doodle during class

 The coveted heart mug! I had never gotten it before, and this one day when I was just sad, I got it :) It was like God's present to me :)

 The Capitol! This was last night, at the Hot-Cocoa-thon, where we successfully passed out 1,000 cups of hot chocolate.

 Earlier this week, we decorated for Christmas! Jordyn decided that she wanted to be a tree for awhile.

 Our real Christmas tree! Brook and Gabe, the 2 male staff, cut it down from our backyard :P

Our doorways are also decorated for Christmas- lights around all the doorways! I love Christmas :)

   

Hot Cocoa-thon

     Tonight is the hot chocolate local outreach. My entire DTS is doing it- all 32 students, anyway, as well as most of the staff. As you may remember, this is a fundraiser for outreach. Our goal is to hand out 1000 cups of hot chocolate downtown... it should be really good! We are splitting into 4 groups and going to 4 different locations downtown in order to do this, since, as Sal nicely put it, all of us at the same place would be pretty creepy!
     Like I said, this is a fundraiser for outreach. If you still would like to donate, please let me know! There are some people who still need almost all of their outreach money, so this is an excellent chance to work with God to provide for them! On one outreach team alone, there is a need of $14000 by January, when we all leave. If you do feel like supporting us financially is something you would like to do, just send me an email at katieroest92@gmail.com. I need to raise an additional $150 for building materials for one opportunity we have in Mexico, helping to build a shelter in Tijuana. So whatever you can offer would be a blessing!
     Tomorrow I plan on going to a coffee shop (called Cool Beans, which excites me. Rebecca will understand) with Anna so that we can talk- we started having a "one on one" a couple days ago, when she was supposed to have one with her actual one on one but she was sleeping. So Anna took me instead. But partway through, when we were just getting into it, Kenzie actually showed up and took over :P So Anna and I want to finish,  and the only way to really be alone here is really to leave. And since I have a car now... hee hee.  Speaking of which, I accidentally drained my battery by leaving my interior light on... good thing we have lots of guys who can help me :P
     Anyway.... the point of the coffee shop thing was, after Anna and I are done talking, perhaps I will take advantage of the good internet there and tell you about my week.
     Again, if you would like to make any sort of donation to outreach funds, please send me an email! Literally anything you can give would be a blessing for us!
     Blessings,
          Katie
   

You are a Saviour... and You take brokenness aside

     This weekend, starting on Sunday and going until about noon today, we are having our outreach "retreats". Basically it is a time to bond as a team and learn a bit more about the culture and languages of the place we are going to.
     As you know, I am going to Mexico for 2 months with a team of 5 other people- we added another member last week! On my team is Jack, Jeremie, Aaron, and myself, with the leaders Keisha and Michele (who are both my small group leaders, so it's great!). For our retreat, we are staying at a house on the outskirts of Madison. The owners of the house are YWAMers who are away for a week or so. I am sleeping in a king sized bed that sinks when you sit on it (its incredible!) with Keisha, so its pretty luxurious here!
     Sunday, our first night here, we were just telling each other our stories. Only 3 people talked about theirs last night, though, before a discussion started about God and who we are to Him, and about wearing masks in life. Anyway, as a result of this discussion, we had a pretty amazing time of intercession for one of the guys in my DTS. It was so cool! Keisha was just giggling so much, full of the joy of the Lord, and I really couldn't stop smiling! I could just feel the joy of God inside of me... It was totally awesome! We ended the spontaneous time of intercession with some worship, during which we received even more to pray about for this one guy.
    The last song we sang was Brokenness Aside. We sang the chorus over and over and over again, marvelling at the truth in the words:
     "Cause I am a sinner, if its not one thing it's another
     Caught up in words, tangled in lies
     But You are a Saviour, and You take brokenness aside
     And make it beautiful, beautiful"
     It was a really amazing time of worship and intercession! We were all just so happy and excited and full of joy. We literally all could not stop grinning and laughing!
     God is good! He is amazing!
     Blessings,
          Katie

Outreach

     As we come closer and closer to the time when we head out for outreach, we are beginning to think about funding for it. Outreach will cost probably between 3 and 4 thousand USD per person.

     So, what we are doing is having a local outreach on December 5. We are going to go downtown to the University of Madison campus and there, we will be handing out free cups of hot chocolate. Our goal is to hand out 1,000 cups. They have done this event in the past, and never have they not reached their goal. 

     The way that this helps us with outreach is we are asking you if you would be willing to sponsor this event. Anything you want to donate would go to helping my pay for my outreach to Mexico. One way you can donate is by pledging a certain amount per cup. A pledge of 1 cent per cup would come to a total donation of $10 for my outreach. 2 cents would come to $20, 10 cents per cup would total at $100. 

     Any way you could support me financially would be awesome, if you would like to donate. But even if you cannot support me that way, I would really appreciate your continued support through prayer! We are really excited for Mexico, and we know that it is going to be a pretty intense time. During a time of intercession over the Mexico outreach, God really communicated how important it will be for us to walk in the opposite spirit. So your prayers are another really awesome way that you can support me!

     If you do want to support me financially, either by sponsoring the hot chocolate event or just giving me a donation, please just let me know through email (katieroest92@gmail.com). After thanksgiving break, we are hoping to buy the plane tickets to Mexico, so they are asking us to have at least $500 in our outreach account by then.

     Thank you all for just supporting me and what I am doing here! I really appreciate all of you! And goodness, do I miss everyone at home! I can't wait to see you all!

     Blessings,

          Katie

2 Months, Destiny, and Life

     I can't believe that yet another week has gone by! Yesterday, we celebrated our 2 month anniversary of DTS and becoming a family (and by "celebrated", I mean we got really excited and that is about it). We only have one month left until Christmas break, and then we go on outreach! It's crazy! And next week is already American Thanksgiving, so we have 5 days off. No one is staying at the TC, so those of us who don't live nearby are going to different people's houses. My friend Rachel has told me from day one that I will be going to her place, so I didn't have much of a decision! ;)
     This week was a crazy week, and I don't even really know why. It was a pretty typical schedule. We learned about destiny, and it was really good. But I was just in such an anti-social mood all week! I just wanted to be alone! It was weird. So I spend a good bit of time in the basement, which is kind of like a dungeon, because no one goes there. Except now people know about it so there always seems to be someone there, and if someone wants me, they know exactly where to find me. Like last night, for instance. I went down and Megan was sitting on the drier (which is the spot), so I went across the stairway to the tiny paint room and sat there. Not five minutes later, Anna came downstairs looking for me, and she dragged me upstairs to "do homework" (we really just hung out in the staff lounge and talked more than we did the work).
     This week, we added another member to team Mexico! There are now six of us going, four students and two staff. The students are me, Jeremie, and Jack, which it always was, and now our German, Aaron, is also coming with us :)
     So. Destiny. It is God's adventure for our lives! Destiny is an intimate relationship with God, from which a ministry and action will flow from. Destiny is a matter of the heart. A person of destiny, our speaker Wick Nease told us, is not someone who is great, but someone who is yielded.
     Wick and his wife Jan have been in YWAM for years. Then, 12 years ago, they felt God calling them to begin a ministry that supports orphanages around the world. They began an organization called Streams of Mercy (www.streamsofmercy.org), and people donate while Wick and Jan give the funds to Christian orphanages, ones that they have carefully screened. Wick and Jan are the only staff of Streams of Mercy, and they are missionary. They raise support and are not on salary for the organization. All the funds go to the orphanages. Wick and Jan's goal is to someday have 100 orphanages that they support. They currently just added on their 31st. Their stories of how God provides the funds are really amazing! Streams of Mercy does not have abundant funds available to them. They rely on people faithfully donating each month. And Wick and Jan themselves will go to visit the orphanages regularly. They are older- their first great-grandchild was born just over a year ago.
     One thing that Wick said that really stood out to me -since I have always had a heart for orphans. Really the whole reason I am here is because I wanted to volunteer in an orphanage but I didn't know how to- was how today, there are 143,000,000 orphans in the world. And there are more than 143,000,000 Christian families in the world. "If every Christian family adopted just one orphan, there would be no more orphans," Wick said. He said that every time he teaches, he challenges the students "Have as many biological children as you want. And then adopt just one. You don't have to stop there, but just adopt at least one." Then he told us a story of how one day, we went out to get the mail or something and he saw a woman walking down the sidewalk pushing a stroller. In the stroller, there was a black baby, and on each side of the stroller was a young child, one Asian and one white (I don't actually remember the ethnicities here, so let's just pretend. I just know that there were 3 different ethnicities). And the woman, when she saw Wick, pointed at him and started yelling "This is all your fault!" He was very confused, until she came closer and he recognized her as a YWAMer, who had once been a student in his class. And he had given that same challenge to that class. Only once she adopted one, she couldn't stop. :)
     Yesterday, we ended class by splitting into small groups and praying for each other. But rather than praying what we wanted, we would listen for God and then pray that. It was so encouraging! It made me laugh when someone go Micah 6:8 for me- I definitely know that verse well, thank you GEMS :) There were other things, and it was super cool.
     Tonight I am going out to dinner (Anna wants steak) with a few of my friends, which should be fun! Then tomorrow, we begin our Outreach Retreats. Basically, we are spending the next 3 days with out outreach groups (Tuesday we come back to the TC and everyone is free for Thanksgiving break). The 2 Uganda teams are staying here at the TC, since there are a lot of them. My Mexico team is going to some person's house in Madison- should be interesting!
     Blessings,
          Katie

 Team Mexico (when we took team photos- now we have one extra person)

 We had our Thanksgiving Love Feast on Thursday night, so we all had to dress up and look nice :P Here are most of the girls.

This is LaShanda, Anna, and me. Roomies, bunk-mates, friends!

I Didn't Cry

     I don't know if you know this, but starting a blog post is so difficult! I never know where to start- I have so much happening in my life these days that it is nearly impossible to remember it all, let alone write it down. Trying to decide what to include in a post and what not to is also very hard. And making the time to do it! That's probably the hardest part of all. With nearly 50 people living in one building, there is always something interesting happening, and you just don't want to miss that! Plus there is an absolutely adorable 4 year old who always wants to play.
     But today is Sunday, and most people are still out doing laundry after church. So I can focus.... but who knows for how long! I was about to start this yesterday when suddenly there was a trip out to Madison for the Olive Garden. And there was no way I was going to miss that! So here is my 2nd attempt...
     Two weeks ago, we learned about the Holy Spirit. Our speaker's name was Mike and he was one of my favourite teachers so far. He put a lot out there for us, but what I really appreciated was the way that he backed everything up with scripture, and if it was just his opinion, he made it clear that it was so.
     The Holy Spirit is the part of the Trinity that is most argued about. Different people have different opinion on who the Spirit is. One thing Mike said that really made me think was that (and this was only his opinion) it could be possible that the reason for such confusion about the Spirit is because He is our greatest weapon as Christians. When we focus so much about arguing about who He is, we don't know how powerful we truly can be with the Spirit inside us. He is our greatest weapon, and an enemy will always try to disarm the greatest weapon first.
     Jesus, before He could begin His ministry on earth, had to first be anointed by the Holy Spirit. If Jesus Christ Himself, who is God, could not enter ministry without being anointed by God, what makes us think that we can do it on our own? We can do nothing and achieve nothing without being filled, led, and empowered by the Holy Spirit.
     We also talked about the gifts of the Spirit, focusing mostly on the gift of tongues (and prophecy), since it is the most talked about one. The gift of tongues is not bad. It is from God, but not everyone has this gift. Tongues literally means languages. This can be a heavenly language, but it could also just be another language in the world. The purpose of the gift of tongues is to edify yourself. It is a line from you to God; unless there is an interpreter, there is no reason to use this gift in front of others, since it does not edify them. The gift of prophecy, on the other hand, edifies the church. Prophecy is for the people, not the individual. If you have one of these gifts, you must be careful to use them properly (just read 1 Corinthians 14). You have the control.
     Basically, Mike told us that we need to let people express their spiritual gifts, since it is of God. We shouldn't be suppressing the Lord.
     At the end of his time with us, Mike prayed for the Holy Spirit to come upon all of us. We were worshipping, kind of gathered into our small groups, and Mike went from one group to another and just prayed over them. It was really cool, because he was praying different things over different groups, and each person later said that it seemed to speak exactly to them. In my small group, he really focused on God's gentleness, and how the Holy Spirit can come in gentleness, yet still just as deep and powerful. And he also prayed a lot about the fear of man, which is something that a lot of us struggle with (though Mike did not know this). Nothing really crazy happened during this time (other than some extremely heavy breathing from Annika, and she enjoys laughing at it now)
     This week was the week that, back at the beginning of DTS, Kenzie and Keisha predicted I would cry during. Roots week. It is the week that we look at our family and history and get to the root of all of our issues and problems :P Our teacher was Gayle Keapproth; he and her husband, Warren, started YWAM Madison. Gayle is intense! She is so filled with the Spirit!
     Here is how our first day of class went (class is about 3-4 hours): Gayle went from one person to another and asked their name, Then she asked why they came to DTS. Then she would continue what we call the "interrogation", asking different questions of different people. And they weren't just light questions. There was one girl, Kayla, who would avoid eye contact every time Gayle was choosing a new "victim", so eventually, Gayle chose her. "Kayla," she said, "What is it that you don't want to answer?" And this was our entire class, by the way. She didn't even get through everyone- the next morning we had to go through the last 5 or 6 people.
     Gayle would spend about 5-10 minutes talking to each person. And at the end, she would tell them a word or a verse that God had given her about them. See, the night before, when she arrived at the TC, she went through the book of students and prayed, asking God about each of us. And He would give her words or verses. And they were spot on. Like one girl talked about how the main thing she has learned in DTS so far is how she should really be more thankful to her parents. And the word Gayle had gotten for her the night before was gratitude.
     When Gayle got to me, pretty early on in the process, I knew exactly what question she was going to ask me. She was asking the questions based on what the Holy Spirit was telling her to say. And I knew that this was a big thing for me in DTS, so I just knew that God was going to get her to ask me about it. And sure enough: "Katie, so, what has God really been showing you so far during DTS?"
     So I told her -how God loves me, which I had thought I knew. But it turns out that His love for me is a really, really big deal! And I never realized how much He loves me!- and she nodded. She asked me a few more things -like why this was such a big thing for me, how God had been communicating His love to me, and so forth- and then gave me some homework. "I want you to read 1 John, specifically 1 John 3," she told me. This was the Bible passage God had given her the night before. So I said I would, and she then told me that the next morning, class would begin by me telling everyone what God had taught me through the passage.
     You have to understand that many many other people also got "homework" from Gayle. But I was the only one who had to share with the class. And I do not like sharing with the class. I do not speak in classes- I never have. I later asked Gayle why she made me tell everyone, and she said that she didn't make that decision, God did.
     Anyway, so I read 1 John 3. And you should read it- it is all about God's love. Like, exactly what I talked about in class to Gayle. So the next morning, we got to class, and Gayle was like "And today we were going to start with..." and everyone cried "Katie!" So much for them forgetting...
     So I explained in two sentences what I had learned (and I had learned so much more than that), and then Gayle made me stand up and she hugged me for literally like 5 minutes while she spoke about God's love for me. It was so awkward because there were like 40 people just staring and I was looking at the row of staff in the back, all watching me. Plus Gayle is significantly shorter than I am, so I was trying to keep my bent legs from giving out :P So while everyone else was extremely touched by that (I had several people tell me that they almost cried), for me it was more uncomfortable and distracted.
     Last week was a really tough week for a lot of people. And we only had about 2 days of actual class. On Wednesday we were having worship, when the Holy Spirit led a whole repentance movement and people were confessing unconfessed sins and such. It was really a powerful, amazing time.
     So it was a good week, but Kenzie and Keisha were wrong! I did not cry! Apparently I didn't have any deep deep roots of trauma... what a surprise :P
     So that is a very, very quick summary of my last two weeks! Yeah... I'm sure I missed a lot, and I didn't even really get into what Gayle spoke about but that's okay!
     Oh, one last story before I go. On Friday night, at about 3 in the morning, we all suddenly awoke when our bedroom lights were turned on (this happened in the boys dorm as well as both girls rooms). An airhorn sounded in the hallway, and we all saw a chicken walking around our rooms. The GMC DTS had snuck in, grabbed 4 of our chickens, and did this. So at 3 in the morning, I found myself running across the frosty grass, with just socks on my feet, holding a chicken to put it back in the coop. I did this twice. It was a pretty entertaining night!
     Blessings,
          Katie

13 of us went to the Olive Garden for Megan's birthday last night. So good!

Freak Fest!

     Freak Fest was on Saturday, November 1. I think I told you before, but it is a big even held by the City of Madison every Halloween. They close off all of State street, and they have 3 big stages with bands playing throughout the night. This year, on the stage near us, the American Authors were performing, so its a pretty big deal. This is right in the area of the University of Wisconsin, so lots of students go out and there are a lot of booze and drugs. YWAM Madison has a student house for about 21 students, and it is one street over from State Street. This was our headquarters for Freak Fest.
     For us, though, Freak Fest began on Wednesday, when we had our weekly gathering of all the YWAM Madison folks here at the TC for Worship and Warfare. During this time, we always worship -duh- and then spend some time in intercession for a specific place, event, or person. This week, our focus was Freak Fest.
     We split into groups of 3 or 4 to pray over Freak Fest. We asked God to speak to us about what He wanted us to pray about. People got verses and pictures and words. I got an image of people dressed up, walking around, and angels walking among them, as well as with us. Another guy in my group got a similar picture. It was pretty cool. And on the night of Freak Fest, people again got images or a knowledge that there were angels among us, just as there were demons among the party goers.
     I already kind of told you about my experiences at Freak Fest. I didn't get to hand out the hot chocolate or hot dogs, but when I was holding the signs for the first 2 hours, I did get to interact with some of the people. A lot of the people, as they walked by after getting a hot dog or hot chocolate, said thank you. One of the YWAM people later said that this year, she heard so many thank you's, while in the 2 previous years that she has done Freak Fest, she hardly heard anyone say thank you. We also had quite a few people ask us why we were doing this. Mostly they asked as they walked by, so we would just call out that it was because Jesus loved and served, so we wanted to do the same, or something to that effect. One or two people actually stopped, though, and so we had a short conversation with a couple of them. Still nothing in-depth, but it was cool!
     At midnight, I went inside, grabbed a quick snack and coffee, and then went upstairs to the intercession room. There were about 4 or 5 of us in there, including Aaron, a guy in my DTS who, for that week, had chosen to take a talking fast. From Monday through Sunday, he didn't talk. It was cool though, cause at the beginning of intercession, he opened his mouth and spoke, saying that God had just given him a verse. I don't remember what the passage was, but basically, it said "You may speak for the sake of Zion" or something. Which was super cool. So Aaron spoke that night, because God told him that he could. And throughout intercession, Aaron would get very specific things from God about what to pray for. For example, he said that he saw a girl, and the paramedics were with her. And then they started doing CPR. Aaron knew everything that was happening there. He knew her name. He knew what was wrong with her. It was really cool. So we prayed for her for awhile. He also got other names at other times, knowing where those people were.
     I eventually went outside, like I said, and stood by the question board. And just prayed and sang and claimed the territory as God's. It was a good night.
     During the first 2 hours of intercession, someone got the name Rachel and that she would be wearing a black and grey chevron skirt. We didn't know what this meant. And at the Wednesday intercession, someone got the image of a rose. We didn't know that those connected, but it turns out that they did.
     Basically, Kayla was walking around praying when someone handed her a rose. She didn't know what to do with it, so she decided to give it to someone. She asked God who she should give it to, and in the end, she gave it to a girl with a black and grey skirt. We don't know for sure, since we never heard it, but we all believe that her name was Rachel.
     One of the girls in my DTS, up until recently, struggled with drugs and alcohol. So coming into Freak Fest, she was really nervous. She knows that this is a temptation for her, so she asked us all to be praying for her throughout the night. Well, at one point during the evening, Kayla was holding signs. Suddenly, she felt the urge to pray for this girl. Immediately to go to her and pray. So she ran across the street to the Phos House, where the girl was handing out hot dogs and hot chocolate. She looked everywhere, running through the house and everything, until she found her, and she prayed. And it was needed at that moment, because that girl had just decided to take a break from handing out the hot dogs to just eat one, and as she did so, a guy walked by with a bottle of her favourite alcohol. And she just got all these desires to go back to that, just as Kayla ran up to her. So that was pretty cool :)
     There were a few other stories from Freak Fest, but I don't really remember them anymore. It was too long ago :P So I shall leave it at that!
     Oh, and I know, I took longer than I thought to get this post done. I was busy, and then on Friday night, at about 1, there was a barfing party with a few people. And Saturday morning, I woke up sick, too. And ever since then, we've been dropping like flies. The few healthy people left were spraying Lysol like crazy and using hand sanitizer every five seconds. Basically over half the school was sick yesterday. But it seems to be just a 24 hour stomach virus, so most of us are feeling better today!
     Blessings,
          Katie

War!

     So. Last week.

     Our teacher was Lea, who also taught us a few weeks ago on Clean Conscience. This week was Spiritual Warfare, though. I was super excited to the teachings this week, because I don't know much about spiritual warfare (or should I say I didn't know much!)

     I honestly don't really know where to begin. There are a few things I want to touch on.

     During our classes on spiritual warfare –and all the time, really-, Lea really depends on God for what to say. She always had kind of a plan for where class would go, but she didn't do much preparing and even when she did have ideas, quite often that wouldn't happen because God would lead her in another direction. That seems to happen rather often with our DTS, actually… our teacher for this week was ahead after yesterday’s class, but today he went off on side trails that the Spirit lead him on, and now we’re behind! It’s great, though… I love it! I'm learning so much!

     Anyway, so I learned a lot last week. The main thing was that I have so much power! As a daughter of God, I can command things in Jesus name and the enemy will listen. But I must follow God in what I say, of course, and not do this lightly. But I do have the power of God in me to stand against the enemy and win. At the end of class on Monday, Lea had us all read Romans 8 by ourselves and figure out what it was saying about us each individually. The next morning, we each stood in front of the class and declared what God had told us, speaking it out loud as to cement it and just declare to God –and the enemy- that we believe it and are taking it as truth.

     One thing that Lea said that sticks out to me was that when we are talking about spiritual warfare –which is happening around all of us. Even though we don’t typically think about it here in North America, it is definitely happening!- was that we can’t just be all in. We must be always on. Every time we pause and just take a breather, the enemy gains ground. As believers in Christ, we have a red target on our backs: “The dragon was enraged at the woman and went off to make war against the rest of her offspring- those who obey God’s commandments and hold to the testimony of Jesus.” –Revelations 12:17. We already know that in the end, Jesus wins. But that doesn't mean that we can be complacent. We are in a war, and we need to be prepared for battle at all times. The devil doesn't take a vacation, and neither can we. To live in spiritual warfare is to live victoriously. We've already won the battle (see Revelations 12:10), so when we choose to walk in that victory, it will become our reality.

     Lea talked about what weapons we have for our spiritual battle. First of all, no matter what, we must follow the lead of the Spirit. We must listen to what God says, because in the end, it is He who wins the battle. His name is the name that has the power. Our responsibility is to hear and obey God- the results are up to Him! We need to walk in that humility. We don’t need to be afraid, because we have the authority of Jesus. God takes us seriously, and so does the darkness. The enemy considers you a threat more than you realize. You have so much power in you because you have God, and the enemy fears that. He likes it when we don’t realize our power and authority.

     There were several spiritual weapons that Lea talked about. I'm not going to go into detail about them (most are quite self-explanatory and don’t even seem like weapons!). The weapons included things like Scripture, living a life of integrity, walking in an opposite spirit (if someone is angry, respond with love and peace), resisting temptation, declaring who God is, resting in our relationship with God, preaching, praying on location, physically claiming territory for God, setting captives free, fasting, giving, signs and wonders, acts of service, acts of faith, and endurance.

     It was a really intense week filled with learning by all of us. Lea also had quite a few really cool stories about her personal experiences with spiritual warfare. One that really stood out to me was when she was on her DTS outreach in Haiti. They were evangelizing in a gazebo, and there was the really, really loud music. Too loud to hear people speaking. Lea and another person felt like they needed to leave the place where they were doing their dramas and just walk around praying. As they passed the house where the loud music was coming from, they prayed over it. Lea saw the image of angels standing with their wings open, blocking the sound, and so she prayed that out. Finally, they felt like they were done praying and decided to head back to the gazebo.  They took a couple steps forward and suddenly the music was muted- they could hardly hear it. They looked at each other, then stepped back a couple steps. The music was blaring loud again. They stepped forward a couple steps- muted. They were so amazed that they kept stepping forward then back. Loud, muted, loud, muted.

     Lea had some other pretty amazing stories, but I think I’ll leave it at this for now. And I shall talk about Freak Fest another time. Maybe tomorrow, cause I don’t have to do a CR, since I made dinner for Christine on Friday, and she still has to clean for me. J But I also have a one-on-one with the speaker for this week tomorrow, sooooo…. We shall see.

     Blessings,

          Katie

Freak Fest and... Other Things

     This past week was so busy! We had something going on every night except for Friday. Only half of our group came back from the Go! Conference last weekend; the Rescue Ops crew went to Arkansas for the week to become search-and-rescue certified. Here at the TC, it was a LOT quieter than normal! There were only 16 students, plus a few staff. We had a lot of fun with our smaller group. We were able to hang out in the hall with everyone and all be involved in the same conversation- normally, it is so loud that everyone has their own conversations out there. It was so nice! We are all glad the Rescue Ops half of our family is back home now, but at the same time, we wish they would just go away, because it is so loud and crowded now! Kenzie put it quite nicely: we missed the individuals, and we love them, but we did not miss the group. It sounds bad, but really, its true. I love all of them, and I'm glad to see them again. I just wish that... it weren't so loud. And so many people :P
     So, last Tuesday afternoon, all of us Children at Risk travelled to the nearby town of Sun Prairie to have orientation for what will be a regular local outreach. It is at a local apartment complex, where an elementary school teacher has started a homework club called Club Tuesday. We are going to be going every Tuesday from now on and being mentors to the kids. Some of us will be one-on-one with a child, helping them with their homework each week, and others will be going to the actual school and leading different groups, such as sports, arts and crafts, and music. I'm looking forward to it! It should be a really good ministry!
     Last Tuesday there were only about 6 or 7 children at the club, since it was the first day. Therefore only some of us got to actually spend time with a child, and we did so in pairs. I was one of the ones who did get to spend time working with a child. I paired up with Anna and we were getting to know Tevin, a 5 year old boy. At first, he wouldn't say a word. He wouldn't even shake his head yes. Anything we asked him he would answer with his head shaking 'no'. His mom was there, and she would let us know the actual answer. So when we learned that his favourite animal was a horse, we each drew one and asked him what we should name it. We ended up drawing all sorts of different animals (and trust me, neither of us have much artistic skill when it comes to drawing!) and he would help us come up with names by the end. When it was time to go, Tevin was laughing and engaging with us, and talking. It was great! So when we were then told that we had to choose the one of us who connected to him the most, so that they could stay with him as his one-on-one, Anna and I couldn't decide. We talked to the leader, and since English is Anna's second language, and she doesn't feel 100% comfortable helping a child with homework in English, we get to stay together and work as a pair, so we both get to continue working with Tevin! We will possibly have a second child with us, but we're excited to work together :)
     On Wednesday night, we all went out for a fun night of bowling. I am terrible. I definitely... yeah. I'm just not a bowler (let's just say that I had the lowest score of all of us... and it was not very high. Like, at all :P). But it was fun!
     Thursday night we had worship night with the GMC DTS coming here to the TC to join us. We finished the time of worship with a screamo song that one of the leaders got from God for our DTS before the school started (if you are interested in hearing what the song says- cause its totally cool!- it is called Army of the Chosen One by Sleeping Giant. Or you can just look up the lyrics).
     Friday night was our only night off last week, so it was good to just relax. :)
     Saturday was an awesome day. In Madison, every year, they have a Halloween even called Freak Fest. This is a big festival on State Street, downtown, where they have music and lots of partying. YWAM Madison has 3 locations- the GMC (Madison's headquarters), the TC (where I live) and the Phos house (Phos=light), which is student housing for the University of Madison. The Phos house is located just beside State street, so every year, we have a ministry during Freak Fest. So we got to participate in that, and it was awesome!
     Saturday morning was spent working on my costume -Kayla, Kenzie, and I were minions. I was in the last car to leave the TC. Anna, Kenzie, and I spent a few hours hanging out in Madison, eating lunch outside of the capitol before heading to the Phos house for our 7:30 orientation. Our ministry began at 10pm.
     Basically what we do is have free hot chocolate and hot dogs for all the partiers. This year, we also had some couches and games on the porch, and big heaters so that people could get warm. Another thing that was new to the ministry this year was the question board. Basically, we had large plywood sheets each with a question on it (What is your greatest fear? What is the purpose of life? etc) and we would ask the people if they wanted to write an answer. This could possibly lead to deeper discussions.
     We had two shifts -the first was from 10 to 12, and the second was from 12 to 2. During the first part of the night, I held signs with my friend Amanda, advertising the hot chocolate and hot dogs a little ways down the street. It was really cool, because I got to interact a bit with people. A lot of people would ask why we were doing this, and we would respond with "Jesus loved and served, and He wants us to do the same:" or some variation of that. A lot of people also thanked us. It was great!
     Out of the first 5 or so people to walk by, though, one tried to kiss me ("Oh, do you have free kisses, too" as he grabbed my face) and one literally picked me up and started walking away with me. That was not so enjoyable, but I wasn't about to quit! Other than that, things were pretty normal.
     During the second shift, I was on intercession. I started in the prayer room inside the Phos House (it was certainly nice to warm up! The temperatures were below 0!). After awhile, I felt like God wanted me to go outside, so I did. I stood by the side, in between the question board and the food station. I talked to a couple people at the question board, but mostly I just prayed as people walked by. At one point, I started singing, and I ended up singing a few songs that I haven't even thought of in years! It was cool :)
     Freak Fest ended at 2am (old time, not new, thank goodness!), and so that is when we shut down, too. Its also when we ran out of hot dogs and hot chocolate, so that's good! We had a quick debrief, and then we headed for our cars. Kenzie, Anna, and I had parked on the other side of downtown, about a half hour walk away. So we walked in the dark, with lots of drunk and high people around us, praying the whole time for invisibility. And I honestly felt invisible most of the time! It was cool. We made it home by 4am old time, 3am new. We were all exhausted and just collapsed into bed.
     Except I felt like God was telling me to get up and continue praying. So I didn't get to bed until about 4 new time. And since the Rescue Ops people got back home on Saturday evening, and they started getting up at 8 on Sunday (which woke me up), I didn't get much sleep!
     So that's about it for what's been happening here! Our classes last week were about spiritual warfare (yay!) so I'll write a post about that soon. I hope :P
     Oh! Funny story before I go. Because the Rescue Ops folks were not around, Christine, who sleeps on the top bunk across from me, slept in the other room, on a bottom bunk. One night, I dreampt that I woke up to her trying to grab something out of her purse, which was hanging off of her bed post. But she couldn't reach, so she was about to climb down.
     "Don't worry about it, Christine," I told her, getting up, "I'll get it."
     I got out of bed and walked over to her bed post. There, I felt for the purse, since it was dark. I couldn't feel it. I sagged against the post, suddenly exhausted (I think that this is when I woke up), and just then, Anna, who couldn't sleep that night, turned on her flashlight to grab a paper and pen. She saw me standing by Christine's bed. "What are you doing?" She asked me.
     "I... have.... no idea" I said, feeling a bit dazed.
     "You should go back to bed," Anna told me.
     So I did, while Anna just cracked up laughing for like 5 minutes.
     It was quite amusing. The next morning, when I saw Anna, I asked her if it had actually happened, and she just keeled over laughing again, because yes, it had.
     So yeah. Apparently I sleepwalk now :P

Me, Kenzie, Anna, and Kayla. Minions, plus Anna was the Grumpy Cat (she just doesn't have her mask on right now)

 This is the whole group of us Children at Risk! All dressed up!

 Annika, Britta, and Kayla holding some of the signs

 Handing out hot chocolate and hot dogs

 We had a movie night on Friday, as usual. We also have a lot of ice cream, and so we decided to skip the bowls. This gallon was done pretty quickly- BUT I was also not the only one eating it!

 We woke up one morning to Bible verses on our mirrors in the bathroom! It is so nice!

Just the sky at sunset one night!

     Blessings,
          Katie

The Roller Coaster

     Being in a DTS is a very unique experience. Basically, you’re at Spiritual boot camp 24/7. Not only do we have worship every day, but our classes are all about God and our faith. And during our free time, especially late at night, we often find ourselves gathered in the hall or in the lounge just talking about things. And I love it. It is awesome. Honestly, choosing to come to Wisconsin was really the best decision I have ever made!

     At the same time, though, it is hard. It’s like I'm on a spiritual roller coaster. Some days, I feel God’s presence so clearly and I can hear Him speaking to me. Other days, no matter how hard I try, I can’t seem to feel or hear Him at all. It can get frustrating, let me tell you!

This past week was definitely a roller-coaster, but mostly I just was struggling to connect with God. On Monday at conference, during worship, during worship, I saw an image from God. But I had no idea what it meant. So I prayed about it, but I still didn't have clarity.

     The next morning, I awoke and my first thought was about the Garden of Eden and how Adam and Eve freely walked with God there (the image had included a beautiful garden). It was literally my first thought, but I wasn't sure if it was just my weird early morning/half asleep brain (cause trust me, there can be some weirdness in my sleep! Oh boy, some of you know!) or if that was actually God letting me know what the vision was about. So I went about the day, but I just couldn't seem to connect to God at all.

     Tuesday night was a really meaningful worship session for most people, but I just couldn't seem to connect with God. After the time was over, the leaders put ipod worship music on and gave us the opportunity to stay and continue to talk to God if we desired. I stayed and was talking with one of my friend (it was Anna). Then Christine came over and started to tell us about how God had been showing her images of ladders all day, and she just couldn't figure out what it was supposed to mean. So then I told them both about what I had seen, and we decided to pray about it together (I'm still not entirely comfortable praying out loud in front of people, but I do it all the time and I'm getting there!) and ask God for clarity.

     After the prayer was over, Anna turned to Christine and explained what she believed the ladders to mean. And it made sense, especially since I had immediately thought of Jacob and his dream about the staircase to Heaven, and the two thoughts related. Just then, Keisha, my one-on-one came over and knelt by Christine. She told her that God had told her to tell Christine something during worship, but she had waited until now. After she said the message, we all just started laughing- it was exactly what we had just discussed about what the ladders meant! It was super cool :)

     Then Anna turned to me and said what she thought mine meant. "I'm not sure exactly where it is in the Bible," she said, "But in the tabernacle, there was a place. I don't know what it was called in English, but it is like the place where it was more holy, where God was." (the Holy of Holies). So once we established what that was, she said that my image was about God wanted me to come into His presence completely. So then I was like "Yeah, considering what my first thoughts this morning were, that would make sense!" 

     So that was really awesome! Absolutely great! But after that, it seemed like I just absolutely could not feel God's presence, and the only time I could ever really hear Him was during intercession on Thursday. And even that was weird- everyone in my group got messages about light, and I got weird images, one of an old man and one of a gingerbread mountain with an elf on top, of all things.

     Still today I am struggling with feeling God's presence and hearing Him. I feel like I am trying and trying and just not getting it. At the same time, weirdly enough, I just feel like God is telling me to be patient and persistent. When I said this in our worship this morning (due to a lack of vehicles at the TC, some of us had church here this morning), when we prayed in small groups, Kenzie grinned, "You aren't hearing God, but He told you to be persistent, huh?" (there would totally be an 'eh' there if she was Canadian!). And yes, its kind of weird and funny, but its true. 

     This coming week, we are learning about Spiritual Warfare (yay!). And honestly, I think it is going to be a really hard week for me. I just feel that God has told me before that spiritual warfare is something that I am going to be experiencing a lot of in my life, and that it is something I need to know about. But the enemy is obviously not going to want that. Really, I feel like my struggle to connect with God is in part because of this. So my goal this week is to be persistent and continue to pursue God, and to pay attention during class no matter how tired I am, or how much my head hurts. And I have this feeling that this week, I'm going to be exhausted and have bad headaches!

     Good thing I've started drinking coffee :) Seriously, last week, I averaged 2 a day. Two an hour, really, cause I'd have one before worship in the morning, and one after.... And sometimes another one after class :P

     So yeah, that's where I am. I wasn't going to write about it, but I feel like it is something God wants me to do (again, I know, weird... I'm struggling to hear Him yet I know He is telling me these things... its is super hard to explain!). One thing we've learned while we have been here is that when you stand up and admit what you are struggling with, it loses its hold on you. You can also find out that while you felt alone and isolated in the struggle, other people might be dealing with the same things. 

     So yeah. That's that. I'd really appreciate your prayers this week, just that I will be able to focus and learn in class, no matter what! 

     Blessings,

          Katie

GO Go Go!

          This past week, my DTS and I, along with 4 other DTSs from various locations across the States, gathered in Missouri for a conference. My DTS left last Saturday morning at 8:30. We piled onto the bus and into one of our large vans and drove all day. We arrived at our destination -Camp David in the Ozark's- at about 6:30 that evening.

     Camp David is a summer camp for the children of incarcerated people. Each summer, the camp hosts 6 week long camps. All the children have at least one parent who is in jail or has been in the past. When we arrived, we were shown to rooms where we would be staying for the night, ate dinner with the Camp David staff, and this was followed by an evening of learning about Camp David, worship, and intercession for the camp.
     The next morning, we ate at the camp and then re-boarded the bus to head off to Roach, Missouri, where the YWAM GO! Conference was being held. Basically, this was 5 DTSs gathered and learning together. It was really like a vacation- instead of having 12 roommates, I had 4, and instead of having 3 toilets (one which doesn't really work) and 4 showers for 35 females, we had one of each for the 5 in our room! It was great! :)
     The focus of the week was Missions. Our speakers were Brian Hogan, who spoke about his experiences church planting in Mongolia, Brad Stanley, who talked about cities and evangelizing, and Amanda Siebold, who spoke about her work at a domestic violence shelter in Kansas City.
     The week was good, and, as usual, we all learned a lot. I especially learned a lot from Brad which I hadn't thought about before -we have been praying for God to give us the opportunity to reach the unreached peoples, and here they are, all gathering in one place! Sometimes, the best way to evangelize isn't to go out into the wilds and find these people, but to just go to the cities, talk to them there, and let them take it back to their people. Brad talked about urbanization in our culture, which is happening at a very rapid rate. Currently, over 50% of the world's population is living in a major urban city, and by 2030, it is estimated that that number will be at 60-65%. The problem is, rather than seeing urbanization as a good thing, many Christians instead moved out of the cities. One thing that Brad said that really stood out to me was that "The city does not create brokenness, it just draws it to the surface and accentuates it."
     Another part of Brad's teaching that really caught me attention was when he discussed immigrants. He has worked with YWAM in Chicago for years, and so he has talked to countless immigrants. One question he will always ask them is what is one thing they really want to do but haven't. And almost every single person he has talked to -and some have lived in America for over 10 years; they are not necessarily new immigrants!- said that they have always wanted to be invited into an American home. But they never have. They also have very rarely heard the words "I'm glad you are here."
     The last point of Brads that really stood out to me was when he talked about the parable of the mustard seed in Matthew 13. We always find great comfort in this parable- you can be like a tiny little seed and have faith like a tiny little seed, and yet you can still do much! But as Brad pointed out, in order for this seed to grow, it first had to be planted. If left on a shelf somewhere, the tiny seed won't do anything. "So go, plant yourself somewhere, and God will use you," Brad said.
     Another thing that happened during conference was we finally got our outreach locations finalized- we had an outreach reveal night nearly two weeks ago. That night, we spent about an hour in worship, preparing our hearts to listen to God. Once we felt ready, we went upstairs where there was a table for each of the five outreach location. Each table had information about the country, a sample of their food, and a couple other things. We got to see the countries and then take as long as we needed to decide which place God was calling us to.
     One of the outreach locations was Uganda. And I wanted to go there- I've always wanted to go to Africa. So I looked at the other tables, but I stayed at Uganda for longer cause that's the place I was most interested in. Usually, the Uganda team goes to a baby home- that would just be totally awesome!
     Another option was Mexico. And for some reason, I found myself drawn back to that table over and over again. I didn't want to go to Mexico- that's barely even going anywhere! Uganda was where I wanted to go!
     But I knew God was telling me no, that He wanted me in Mexico. So I sat down on a couch with the paper that I needed to number my choices on. But I just couldn't do it. I couldn't write it down. "Please, God," I said, "If you want me to go to Mexico, confirm it."
     About a minute later, Kenzie, one of the staff members, walked over to me. "How are you doing? Need to verbally process or talk about it?"
     I shook my head, "I think I know. I just don't want to write it down," I told her.
     She nodded and sat down beside me and held out a plate that she had, "Well, do you want some salsa and chips? They're from Mexico!"
     So.... now that the teams are finalized, it is official: I will be heading to Mexico after Christmas for a couple of months! Mexico is the smallest team- only two students besides me signed up for it. But I think it will be a good team!
     The funny thing is that the Uganda team is the biggest. Over 1/3rd of our DTS is going there. Almost everybody put Uganda as either number one or two. This has never happened before. Usually, Uganda is a very small team. This year, they are sending two teams to that country. And a few of the people going there did not want to go there! One of the girls literally just came back from a month serving in Uganda, and that was the last place she wanted to go to. Another girl has lived in Africa for most of her life, so she wanted to go to Asia or somewhere different. But God is calling her to Uganda, just as He is calling me to Mexico.
     When we left the conference on Friday afternoon, we only took half our DTS with us, The Rescue Ops people travelled to Arkansas, where they are staying for the week. So here at the TC, it is quite quiet and strange! Half the family is gone! There is currently only one guy here, other than 4 year old Micah. It is just strange!
     One thing I really love here is the relationships I am building. We all get along really well and you can talk to anyone, but I've come to know a few people better than others. After lunch on Thursday, some people from my DTS got baptised in the lake at the conference. Kenzie and I decided to sit and talk nearby until it was time for the baptism. The next thing we knew, it was nearly dinner time! And last night, again, we started talking and the next thing we knew, it was nearly one in the morning. I've also grown close to my bunkmate, Anna. She's attempting to teach me Portuguese (she is from Brazil). We have a lot of fun together. Last night, after Kenzie went to bed, Anna and I went stargazing. We were sitting there, looking at the stars, when I said "Anna, we don't get to clean the guy's bathroom together this week! It's so sad!" (since the Rescue Ops people are gone, our chores got shifted a bit). Anna looked at me and started laughing, "That was what I was just thinking!" she told me. I don't know, I guess stars just make us think of those things... :P
     Anna also really wanted to see a shooting star. But there was nothing. So we were beginning to get a bit cold, so at 1:37, we decided to give it 5 more minutes. We prayed and begged God to send a shooting star, because we were going inside at 1:42. At exactly 1:42, there was a huge shooting star :)
     So life here is busy, but really fun :) And I have picked out a few pictures to show you... but trust me, this is just a tiny snippet of my life!

 This is The Hallway, on any given night. We like to hang out here.

 Just some pictures from GO Conference. We split into teams for games that involved shaving cream. And one with eggs (I ended up having 2 raw eggs cracked on my head). Christine and a couple others were baptised, and my DTS had an hour of worship in a cave.

 On the night of our Love Feast (we all had to dress up), we took some girls pictures :)

 After supper one day, a few of us had a craving for ice cream. So we drove over to a local ice cream place, Sassy Cow. There are quite a few Sassy Cow trips around here!

 This is my entire DTS family -staff and students- other than the two staff members who did not go to the GO Conference.

 This is Keisha and Anna. Keish-Keish is my one-on-one. They were holding my ipod for me while I wrestled Kenzie, and as you can see, they had some fun...

 This is the view at Camp David... it was beautiful!

 We had worship in this cave... at the very end of the cave. Not in the entrance!

 The lake at the GO Conference

I saw the sunrise as I walked to breakfast every morning of the GO Conference. It was absolutely beautiful!

     Blessings,

          Katie