Saturday, December 31, 2016

2016

     Well, we made it, guys. Here we are, on the last day of 2016. Tonight, people will be partying and celebrating with family and friends as we usher in the new year.
     To be honest, new years has never been my favourite holiday. I just don't see the appeal in staying up until midnight just to say "Happy new year!" and then go to bed. I very much enjoy sleep, so I'd be 100% ok with skipping the festivities and hitting the sack at 10 o'clock!
     However, new years is a really good time to reflect on the year that has passed, and to look forward to a new year. 2016 has been a good year for me. It started with me living in Madison, running the preschool (man, I miss those children!), and it is ending with me back home, working at the greenhouse. It has been a year with the good and the bad -like every year, I suppose. My Opa passed away in February, and I had to move away from a really great community (and roommate- oh how I miss Kenzie!). I grew in my relationship with God and my brother got married (and I therefore finally have a sister!). All in all, it was a good year.
     Back in January, I sat down and asked God what 2016 held for Him and I. Looking back on that list, it's cool to reflect on how I can see each item and how God was faithful to what He said. For example, one of the things was "Learning how to grow with God independently, without having classes and YWAM community." 
     This was a big one for me. Growing up, I had a quiet time every morning after breakfast; it was part of my schooling, really. But as I got older, quiet times grew harder to have. I would skip them more then I'd have them. Then I went to DTS and quiet times were scheduled into our daily schedule. This was a time of great growth for me, and my relationship with God definitely grew because of it.
     Then I went back home after DTS and my quiet times basically stopped again. When I returned on staff and was living with the DTS, I again started to grow in my relationship with God because not only did I have quiet times in my schedule again, but I also was attending DTS classes again. Learning how to grow in my relationship with God independently was something that I had no idea how to do.
     I can't say that I have a "quiet time" every day, but I definitely talk to God every day. My job offers many opportunities to spend time with God while I'm working alone. And while I still have a lot of room to grow in this area, I definitely can see how far I have come in the past year. I am able to sit down and read the Bible and really learn from it, without having someone there to tell me what it means. 
     Another item on the list was "Grow in confidence". I totally can see this in myself this year. I've never been the most confident person. I'd always second guess myself. I do this so less often now! God has definitely given me a confidence about who I am and who He is. Because I know my identity as His daughter, I am able to stand firm in that. One area where I really see this most is at youth group. God asked me to be a youth leader at my church this year, so of course I listened and am doing that. To be honest, teenagers kinda scare me and the are definitely not my favourite age to be around. But God has given me the confidence to be a youth leader and to stand firm in the things I believe. It's been cool to see!
     On the list of things God told me would happen during 2016, it also said "Searching". This is so true! After coming back from Madison, I was searching for who I am, for my worth, for what God wanted me to do next. I've spent a lot of time this year searching, and God has given me a lot of answers -although definitely not all! I've made discoveries about myself and about God and it's been pretty terrific!
     So yeah, 2016 has been a year of growth for me, and a year where I have really seen God's faithfulness. It's been a year where I have really put my trust in God, and He has not failed me. I'm looking forward to this coming year, and seeing what adventures and lessons God has for me in the next 365 days!
     Blessings,
          Katie

Thursday, October 20, 2016

God is Faithful

    Being back in Madison for this week, I have naturally have had many (terrific) memories coming to me. Yesterday, I spent hours with a friend from my DTS, and over the course of our time together, we laughed and remembered the good times we had back when we were DTS students living in the TC. We remembered the time that some friends put chickens in our rooms in the middle of the night. We remembered planning escape routes for running away from hard talks (let's just say that we weren't the best at being vulnerable, and while I still have a hard time with it, I definitely have grown in vulnerability over the course of the past couple years!). We remembered racing each other to try and get our favourite spot in the classroom. Rachel and I have lots of good memories of our times in DTS, both together and with others. 
     As we were talking about outreach, I recalled how when I went to DTS, I was sure that I would end up going to India for outreach. I knew that Madison often sends teams there, but there was no reason for me to assume that that was where I would be going. However, my logic behind that assumption was that I really did NOT want to go, thus I would probably end up having to go.
     As I said this to Rachel, I realized something: that was my view of God back then. In my mind, He would send me to the places that I did not want to go to, and He would make me do the things that I really didn't want to do. My idea of who God is was so skewed! How was it that I thought that God's character was so... so not nice? How could I think that my God was a God who would use his power and authority to make people do things that they don't want to do? How did I have such a messed up idea of the character of God? And how did I forget that I once thought that?
     Reminiscing about my DTS, I remember how it was a season where God really focused on teaching me how much He LOVES me. He loves me simply for who I am. I had thought that I knew that, going into DTS, but during those six months, I really learned how deep His love for me goes. And I thought that was so cool and awesome and amazing.
     Now, looking back on those lessons that God taught and showed me, I see that it was about so much more than God assuring me that He loves me beyond measure. I mean, yeah, He wants me to know that and it was something I needed to really understand, but it was about more than me knowing God's love. It was about changing my whole view of God. Without me even realizing it, God showed me -through focusing on His love for me- how deeply wrong I was in my view of Him. He showed me how different His character is from what I had thought. By stressing His love for me, He showed me who He really is, and how GOOD He is. It was the stepping stone for me learning how to truly trust God, which was something that He really focused on last fall. 
     The lessons I learned in DTS were so much more than I thought they were. They went so much deeper than me simply being a beloved daughter of the King. God used that time as a foundation for the lessons I have been learning over the year and a half since I graduated from my DTS. And it wouldn't surprise me at all if the lessons that I learned during my DTS will continue to be a part of the lessons I will learn in the future. 
     God is faithful, and He is so committed to me -and you! When He says something, He means it. But more than that, when He speaks to us about things and reveals things to us, it goes beyond the current time and place. It goes beyond that moment! 
     Our God is truly amazing. He is incredible. I'm in awe of Him, I truly am! DTS was two years ago, and I am still having revelations and insights from that time! I am still learning from things that were said or taught to me during that season of my life. God knows me so well that He knows when to teach me certain things, and when to reveal things to me.
     God, you are a good, good Father. You are an amazing, wonderful, loving, powerful, gentle, and kind God. You... there are simply not words that can describe You, no words that can truly show how amazing you are!
     Blessings,
          Katie
On Sunday, Kenzie and I went on a hike north of Madison -so beautiful!

During our hike we left the trail fairly quickly and just followed the creek, clambering over rocks and crisscrossing the creek too many times to count. But neither of us fell in, yay!

Rachel and I attempted to take a picture at the end of our visit

When I first arrived in Madison on Friday night, Kenzie had placed a small Canadian flag on my bed in welcome -awwwww :) Then she pretty much just passed on halfway on her bed, halfway on mine. Soooo pretty much a normal day in our lives!

Friday evening Kenzie and I were trying to decide between seeing people and chasing the sunset. We decided on chasing the sunset, but as we were driving down the road, one of our friends spotted me in the car and ran into the street to stop us. And so we ended up socializing for awhile -I had a lot of people to say hi to!- before sneaking off to chase our sunset. It was almost done by the time we got through the mental institution to the lake, but was still beautiful!

Tuesday, October 18, 2016

I'm Back!

     Wow, it has been awhile! And now here I am, sitting in Cool Beans, drinking a Mocha Slide, while typing up a blog post... just like the old times, except today is Tuesday and not Wednesday, which was my normal Cool-Beans-and-blog day!
     Yes, I am back in Madison, but only for a visit. I arrived on Friday evening, and I will be heading home again on Sunday morning. I'm only here for just over a week, but it is so so so so so good to be 'home'. So good to see everyone again! Kenzie and I have been having quite a lot of fun, being reunited and sharing a room again! She had yet to remove my mattress from her bedroom, so that made for an easy set-up of my old spot on the floor! :)
     The weekend was filled with laughter and fun, and ice cream, of course. I plan on going to the new kindergarten someday this week, to see my old preschoolers. I got to see Micah on Saturday night, when I went over to his house to deliver a few Canadian treats for his parents -and he ended up tackling me for about half an hour. Just like the old times. It was great! I miss that kid so much! At one point, I ended up going downstairs to visit with my friends who live in the basement apartment, and Micah said "But, you're going to come back, right T? Come back before you leave!"
     Oh Micah James <3 He is going to be a big brother come December, and I am so excited! Even though I won't be here...
     Yesterday, Kenzie took the day off of work, so we went to the TC, the place where DTSes are run, to join the DTS for worship. I can't believe that this is the second fall DTS since my own! Crazy how fast time goes! It was amazing to be able to worship with a DTS again -those are always great times!- and after that, Kenz and I sat in on the first little bit of class.
     While sitting in that class, God really showed me how far I have come since the two years ago that I first stepped foot in YWAM Madison. I vividly remember back when I sat in that classroom as a student, soaking in the teachings. God has taught me so much in the past two years, and I have grown so much in my relationship with Him. Often, I don't feel like I have grown very much, like I don't really know much of anything about God. But during those fifteen minutes in class yesterday, God not only confirmed to me where He has asked me to be right now, but he also showed me that I have indeed grown so much! I still have so much to learn, but I'm definitely not in the same place that I was a couple years ago.
     Speaking of that, I have a totally awesome story of God's faithfulness to tell you, but I'll save that for another day :) Once it is official.
     So I guess that's it for now! I've gotta go enjoy Madison while I still can!
     Blessings,
          Katie

Monday, April 25, 2016

Where I Am Now

     I've been home for just over two weeks now, and I realized that I have not even updated this blog to let you all know that I am back in Canada safe and sound!
     It seems crazy that it has only been two weeks. Seriously. I feel like I have been home for forever. I feel like Madison was eons ago, yet at the same time, it feels like I just left (and really, I did). Kenzie and I were talking and saying how that first weeks just dragged on and on and on.
     While it is great being home, and seeing my family and friends here, I really really miss Madison. I miss my YWAM Madison community. I miss my roommate. I miss my children. I miss preschool. I miss America.
     My time is now occupied by working at the greenhouse. I work six days a week, which makes for a busy life, yet at the same time, I am still growing in my relationship with God. That won't ever stop! One thing I really love about working at the greenhouse is the conversations that I am able to have with people. Some of my good friends work with me, and I have had some really great conversations about God with them over these past few weeks. Since I'm so used to being in a Christian community, and talking about God, it is awesome to have these people who I can continue that with. :)
     So that's my next step- returning to the greenhouse, working there for the summer. I know what God has asked of me, and I know that it will take a lot of trust and constant communication with Him to do it, but if there is one thing that I have learned over my eight months on staff with YWAM Madison, it is that God is completely, utterly, and absolutely trustworthy, and He is always faithful.
     Tonight, during my quiet time, I pulled out a letter that I wrote at the beginning of my time on staff. I had forgotten about it until now, and so I read it and spent time with God, just reflecting over the seven months of preschool. A few of the questions I had written to ask God included "How were lives changed?", "How and where did I see God's faithfulness?", and "What have I learned in my time on staff with YWAM Madison, and through the preschool?"
     It was really great to reflect on these questions and see that God indeed answered them. The lives of those children were changed. MY life was changed. I saw God's faithfulness in SO many ways, just one being the provision for preschool and the continuation of it. And I learned to much about trusting God -this really was a whole season for that lesson!- not to mention I learned even more about His love for me, and His trust in ME (crazy thought!), and much, much, much more!
     So now here I am, away from all my life was for the past eight-nine months. I'm away from YWAM Madison, away from my seven wonderfully amazing preschoolers, away from my hilarious roommate (and one of my closest friends), away from all that. Yet God is still with me, and He is still teaching me things, and He is still showing Himself to be faithful, to be trustworthy, and to be good.
     I can't wait to take my next steps with God (no matter how scary they are!)
     Blessings,
          Katie

This. Just this. It's SO TRUE!!

One upside of starting work at 7am is that when I leave the house, the sun is just rising. And it is BEAUTIFUL!

My preschooler's parents went together and bought me a travel mug with pictures of my kids on it :) It came in the mail last week!

My last Madison sunset. I miss those :(

Oh Kenzie. She snuck a note into my bag when I left. So I got home and was unpacking when I found this envelop. I was like "Awwww Kenz is so sweet!" Then I opened it X) I MISS my dear, dear roomie! Thankfully we can -and definitely do- text! :)

Friday, April 8, 2016

Goodbye

     On September 15, 2015, I walked into the freshly prepared preschool room, nervous but (kind of) ready to greet the seven students I would be spending the next several months with. Over the time since then, I have had the honour of teaching these kids, praying with them, laughing with them, and getting to know each one. These seven kids are each so special and I know that God is going to take them to some amazing places as they continue their lives. I'm blessed to have spent the past several months with them, and I thank God for entrusting this job to me. I love them, and today I said goodbye to them as we had our final preschool class. I miss them already!
     On Wednesday, at staff meeting, the leaders prayed for me as I depart, but my kid's parents also surprised me with the CUTEST video of the kids, and they are giving me a travel mug with photos from our class on it. However, since I'm the one who has taken all the pictures, they decided to send PD's wife, Amy into our class yesterday so that we could get some photos with me in it. That made for the perfect opportunity for a class photo! It was the perfect day, since it was Judah's day to be there, and all the kids were there :) So these are my goofballs! I love them! I can't stand goodbyes, but today, I had to say so many, to some pretty precious people! :(
     Tomorrow, I pack up and then on Sunday, I head back home.
     Blessings,
          Katie

Wednesday, April 6, 2016

The Last Week

     Wow. I'm writing my next blog post, which I always do on Wednesdays at Cool Beans. Since I'm now writing it, that means one thing: This is my last time doing this. This is my final time sitting in Cool Beans, drinking a Mocha Slide while I update you all on what is happening here in Madison. This afternoon, it will be my last time going over to the GMC for Worship and Warfare, and then it will be my final staff meeting with YWAM Madison. On Sunday, I'm going home.
     It's crazy how fast time passes. It really feels like it was just a month or two ago that I first arrived in Madison, after that craziness of trying to cross the border, and ate ice cream on Kenzie's cloud bed. Yet that was 8 months ago already! When I first arrived back in Madison, I knew that my time on staff would go by fast, but I still don't understand how it is already at the end!
     This week is bitter-sweet for me. I'm glad to be going home; I know that God only called me to Madison for a short time, and that I am supposed to go home now. I miss all of you back in Canada, and I'm so excited to see you all again (for more than just a short visit)! At the same time, just the thought of leaving Madison and my 'family' here makes my heart hurt. I love my people! I don't want to say goodbye!
     Yesterday, at preschool, one of the children was talking about me leaving. "Miss Katie," he said, "You're leaving, but you won't forget us. And we can think about you and what we learned at school!"
     Man, I love them!
     Yesterday, for the first time in awhile, I ran preschool all by myself; ever since he took over for the couple days while I was home for Opa's funeral, PD has joined us at preschool. And for the past two weeks, he has been the one to teach the Bible lessons. It's kind of like I have a placement student, which is kind of strange but also really nice (the extra help, I mean). Anyway, it was really great yesterday, leading circle -I mean Oval- again. I didn't realize how much I missed doing that! We talked about how Jesus told Peter to take care of his people, and how we also need to do the same. And then the kids listed off ways that we can take care of people.
     Later in the day, we made some clay dough, and the kids were playing with it. One child didn't have a roller stick thing, so I went to get him one when he asked. Meanwhile, another child gave the first child his roller. When the other children and I realized, one of the other children piped up "Justin was taking care of him!"
     It was cute :)
     Now, we only have two days of preschool left. Two days. That's it. Two. Days. HOW are there only two days left?! How do I only have two days remaining with these terrific, adorable, sweet, funny kids?! Seriously... I don't understand how time passes so fast!
     So Friday -April 8- is our final day of preschool for the year. After I leave, a lot of YWAM Madison's staff are going down to Missouri for the DNA conference, which is about the heart/history of YWAM with some of the speakers being Darlene and Loren Cunningham, the founders of YWAM. PD is one of those going to the conference, so while he considered keeping preschool running for a few weeks longer after I left, that is not going to be happening. Once I leave, it will be finished for the year.
     However, just because I am leaving does not mean that preschool is over for good! In September, it is looking like there will be a FULL TIME kindergarten (which PD will be running) as well as a part time preschool like we had this year. God is faithful, but even if this preschool was just for this one year, it would have been worth it. We talked about that in our last intercession time. Greg, the one who had this vision for YWAM Madison in the first place, and the father of one of my preschoolers, was saying that even for one year, the preschool was worth it, because you can see a difference in the children.
     And it's true. Looking back to September, when the children first entered the cheery blue classroom, they were different. Of course they knew Jesus and were good kids, but I can see how they have grown in their faith and knowledge since then. Just in the way they interact with each other and treat each other has changed. Yes, they are still four and five year old kids, so they have their arguments and struggles, but in general, they share more, they are more compassionate towards each other, and they welcome everyone. And that's just a tiny bit of how they have grown!
     My heart hurts so much knowing that I have to leave, but I know that God brought me here for a reason, and I know that God will be faithful to continue to be with me and show me what He has for me.
     And when I'm home, I'm still going to be working alongside YWAM Madison for a short while -in the evenings, I suppose, since I'll be working all day at Zomers again. I have been helping work on the database, since they are completely re-vamping it. All this is done independently, on a computer, and since it is just Kenzie and I helping out the main person (who is also a full-time mom of two young children) on this, I offered to continue to do so after I go home.
     So here I am, sitting at Cool Beans for the last time, only days from my departure from Madison, Wisconsin. I'll miss this place (Madison, not just Cool Beans!) and these people, but I know that I will see them again. I've already got a visit scheduled! :)
     See you all in a few days!
     Blessings,
          Katie
Kenzie texted this to me the other day. Thus sums up our relationship :P Also, ignore her name on there, I promise it is a joke, because her mom called her a Lardo while we were visiting, and she is completely NOT. Kenz thinks its hilarious that when people see her name, they will think that I'm a horrible person. :P

The couple that Kenzie and I are living with are currently in the process of being licensed for foster care (the home study was on Monday, so they're almost done!). So they now have my old bedroom set up as a nursery, with a crib, change table, and toys! It is so cute and happy! The other night, I sat upstairs talking to Kelly for like 2 1/2 hours while we built towers. Such fun!

On Instagram, I follow YWAM memes. They're pretty great and when you are in YWAM, you definitely completely relate to most- if not all- of them! I really like this one, cause its so true!

Thursday, March 31, 2016

For the Sake of the World

"I'm laying down my life
I'm giving up control
I'm never looking back
I surrender all
I'm living for Your glory on the earth

"This passion in my heart
This stirring in my soul
To see the nations bow
For all the world to know
I'm living for Your glory on the earth

"For the sake of the world burn like a fire in me
Light a flame in my soul for every eye to see
For the sake of the world burn like a fire in me

"For every knee to bow down
For every heart to believe
For every voice to cry out
Burn like a fire in me
For every tongue to confess
You alone are the King
You are the hope of the earth
Burn like a fire in me"

-For the Sake of the World by Bethel
(To listen to it: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NAS0936wkBw)

For the past.... well, few MONTHS, it seems, this song has been in my head. And I love it. And have started listening to it on repeat (Joel would not be surprised). So I thought I would share it with you all :)
     Blessings,
          Katie